What does success mean to you? (Laura's Story)
- Laura
- Aug 2, 2023
- 3 min read
When I get asked if my surgery was successful I find myself trying to decide how to answer. Success means something different to just about everyone I've met in the MALS Community.
When I was first diagnosed at 16 my version of success was very different compared to how it is now at 29. I wanted to be able to go to college, become a doctor, and live a normal life. That was my version of success. When that didn't happen it was soul-crushing.
After my surgery didn't make me feel better at 16 I decided I was done with doctors. I had been told "This is the surgery that will fix you." so many times by that point I just didn't believe there was a "fixing" me anymore. So I resigned myself to a life of dealing with flares and being mainly bedridden.
It wasn't until I was 19 that I finally decided to go back to a vascular doctor. Not only did I find out my MALS was back but it turned out I had Superior Mesenteric Artery Syndrome (SMAS), Nutcracker Syndrome (NCS), Pelvic Congestion Syndrome (PCS), and May Thurner Syndrome (MTS). I came into my first appointment to find a doctor and a room full of students staring at me like I was a walking miracle. Turns out I very much was. I was told my body was a ticking time bomb and I needed to decide if I wanted to go ahead with surgery or not very quickly.
After that, it is kind of a blur. I remember writing my will as I was having an experimental surgery, the first like it in the States. I was going to be the first surgery on record to fix MALS, SMAS, NCS, and PCS at the same time. It was being recorded and sent out to other schools. I kept thinking about the fact that if I didn't make it that at least the next person would have a template of what to do.
That's when the meaning of success changed for me. Instead of wanting to grow up and become a doctor I wanted to help other patients like me. They would be my success story. The ones who didn't have to wait till their bodies were at their breaking point to get help. There would be an example of this "miracle" in the medical world. Even if I wasn't in it anymore.
Luckily I made it through that surgery but symptom relief was minimal. I was semi-functional in medical terms. I struggled to admit that this was what my life would look like. Till I realized all the things I would have missed if I hadn't gotten treatment. My success turned into all the big and little moments of joy I had around me. Was I ever going to be normal? No, but I was happy with what my life was and that was enough.
During Covid, I found out that my compressions were all back and with a vengeance. Once again I was told "It's time to go now" for surgery. There wasn't time to "shop around" for doctors. So off I went for surgery again and once again I'd be a first for the States. I had MALS, SMAS, and NCS treated again.. But this time my inferior vena cava wanted in on the action. The doctors had to rebuild it by hand as it had become so weak while trying to maintain my body with my other compressions bogging it down.
Not that long ago I had a call from them to ask how I was doing.. When I told them I was still experiencing symptoms they were all disappointed. I wasn't. I knew that was likely what was going to happen but that wasn't what I was looking for.
My success is seeing the new multiple compression cases getting treated like horses instead of unicorns. My success is seeing my nieces and nephews grow up. My success is cuddling in bed with my cat during my flares. My success is making graphics for multiple compression patients with my spouse. My success is the legacy of this foundation.
If that's not success what is? So when you ask someone if their surgery was successful you may be surprised by their answer. Every one of us has a different version of success and what we want to happen. That may not be what we get but that doesn't always mean we aren't a success story.
So what is your version of success? Did you reach it or did it change as your recovery went on?
We'd love to hear about your story. If you'd like to submit your version of success please click the link below.
Hallo Laura, danke für diesen wirklich nachdenklich stimmenden Beitrag! Deine Geschichte hat mich sehr berührt und mir kam sofort eine ähnliche Situation in den Sinn, als ich vor Jahren meinen Job gewechselt habe. Damals habe ich auch lange überlegt, was Erfolg für mich persönlich bedeutet, und es war definitiv kein einfacher Weg. Ich stimme dir vollkommen zu, dass Erfolg oft eine sehr individuelle Angelegenheit ist. Was mich besonders interessiert, ist deine Aussage, dass Erfolg kontextabhängig ist https://wildsinos.at/ Das finde ich einen super wichtigen Punkt, den man oft vergisst. Was in einer Lebensphase als Erfolg zählt, kann sich in der nächsten schon komplett ändern. Deine Beobachtung über die Entwicklung von "What does success mean to you?" ist auch faszinierend. Ich frage…
Hallo Laura, vielen Dank für diesen wirklich tiefgründigen Beitrag! Deine Geschichte über den Erfolg hat mich sehr zum Nachdenken gebracht. Du hast absolut Recht, wenn du sagst, dass "what does success mean to you?" viel zu oft nur oberflächlich betrachtet wird. Deine Ausführungen dazu, wie sich deine Definition von Erfolg über die Zeit verändert hat, sind besonders wertvoll. Das spürt man richtig, wie viel Arbeit und Selbstreflexion darin steckt. Ich frage mich auch oft, was Erfolg wirklich bedeutet https://coolzinos.at/ Für mich persönlich war es lange Zeit nur an äußeren Anerkennungen und materiellen Dingen festzumachen. Doch je älter ich werde, desto mehr erkenne ich, dass wahre Zufriedenheit und Erfüllung ganz andere Wurzeln haben. Dein Beitrag, besonders der Teil, wo du deine…
Laura, vielen herzlichen Dank für diesen wirklich aufschlussreichen Beitrag! Ich habe ihn gerade durchgelesen und bin absolut begeistert von deiner Perspektive. Du triffst den Nagel auf den Kopf, wenn du sagst, dass Erfolg nicht nur aus materiellen Dingen besteht. Das ist etwas, das ich selbst in letzter Zeit stark verinnerlicht habe https://sportazas.at/ Vor ein paar Jahren habe ich mich noch stark an äußeren Erfolgsindikatoren orientiert, aber das hat mich ehrlich gesagt nicht glücklicher gemacht. Deine Gedanken darüber, was Erfolg wirklich ausmacht, haben meine eigene Denkweise noch einmal vertieft. Besonders der Punkt, dass persönliches Wachstum und das Erreichen von selbstgesteckten Zielen so wichtig sind, resoniert stark mit mir. Ich teile deine Meinung voll und ganz, dass es darum geht, die eigene…
Laura, your logic behind redefining success truly resonates, and honestly, the writing quality here is exceptional. Thank you for sharing such a thoughtful piece. It’s not just about the typical milestones; it's about that internal satisfaction, the quiet pride in a job well done or a personal goal achieved, something I've found myself increasingly valuing. This post is definitely going into my personal resource collection on what success actually means. My own journey mirrors yours quite closely; I've shifted my focus from external validation to that deeper sense of fulfillment. Perhaps a glossary of terms related to this broader understanding of success could be a helpful addition for newcomers to this perspective. I'm certainly going to hand this off in…
This is such a thought-provoking piece, Laura. Honestly, the world feels a little brighter with content that delves into what success truly signifies, and your perspective on it is wonderfully mature and refreshing. Your introduction really drew me in, setting a great tone for the rest of the post. I was particularly interested in your detailed insights on this topic https://nppa.com.au/ It made me reflect on my own journey and how my definition of success has evolved over the years, shifting from purely external validation to a more internal sense of fulfillment and purpose. What struck me most, though, was your exploration of the biggest gap in current thinking about success. That's a question that really resonates, as I often…